That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
