If i come over, it means nothing
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Randomize
