Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
