sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Randomize
