is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
