Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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