I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Randomize