Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I wish i was in the wii world.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
