just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
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