my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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