do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
My brain says no but my pants say off.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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