Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
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