im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
