id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
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