oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
