i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Randomize
