i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
