Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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