i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
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