no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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