I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
