Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Randomize
