it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Randomize
