member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Randomize