Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
i believe in u and ur pee
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
