It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
My bed smells like the plague
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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