why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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