Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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