these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
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