i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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