is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize
