It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
