Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize