are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
