Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
