Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize