i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize