I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize