i permit you to call me
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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