We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
