My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize