i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
