let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Randomize
