actually, I'm a sock model
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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