You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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