I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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