Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
