How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Randomize