I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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