Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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