Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
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