i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize
